Last night I rented your latest blockbuster, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. While I'll never complain about seeing you on screen, I regret to say the movie itself was a huge disappointment. Furthermore, I would greatly appreciate those three hours of my life back. Not only was this movie incredibly dull, the story, aside from a few Forrest Gump-esque vignettes, was completely predictable.
I won't go into the fact that the concept of this story was arguably my own... I have been talking about the idea of people aging backwards far longer than the script was in existence... what's done is done. More importantly, the majority of the make-up was pretty creepy, why your character was aging in reverse was never addressed (it couldn't have been from the backwards clock, it died a year before BB did, why didn't this character ever think to go to a doctor?), and what the Academy saw in this film that was Oscar worthy is completely beyond me. This movie was more acclaimed than Gran Torrino??
Please go back to doing what you do best, adopting kids with Angie, making Jen miserable, and filming Ocean's movies with my love, George Clooney.
Sincerely,
Carina
4 comments:
Carina,
I thought the movie was a cinematic masterpiece.
We are no longer friends.
Next time you come to Vegas... Nick is invited to all functions... (unless he has some competing alter-blog preaching Button hatred that I am not privy to).
Has Texas gone to your brain???
Are you no longer a ballet fan??
Do you like raisins???
How's your Dad???
"Tell Carina that TCCOBB is one of the most creative love stories put onto film." -Jamie Johnson
Thank you,
Marty Rempp
Say hello to Marty next time you see or hear from him, Carina - it's so nice that he always asks about me whenever he contacts you, and all that after a few games of tossing horseshoes at the trailer in Cheney; how interesting. Your Mom and I will be back in Spokane after my 4/23 appointment, we'll let you know when; also I need to talk to you about your 2008 tax prepayments.
Love, your Dad
As an additional comment from your faaather - last Sunday your mom and I went to see "Duplicity" with Julia Roberts and Clive Owen. While I like Roberts and Own as performers, I thought the move was a confusing mish-mash of (at times) somewhat strange dialog, but particularly confusing flashbacks. The producers got so wrapped up in their desire to make an intelligent & captivating movie (in the style of the Audrey Hepburn/Cary Grant "Charade" film, I guess), that they just threw everything in, but in so doing they overshot their goal - to make a movie one could understand and follow. Oh well, too much sophistication does not always work, I guess; just don't spend your money on this movie, particularly after you've just seen this Pitt thing (which has always sounded rather weird to me, 'though I haven't seen it).
Your Dad.
Marty,
First, I just caught your last name. I can't stop laughing.
Second, please tell your wife that she is probably enamored with this movie only because the idea was first mine. I won't hold it against her that she is confusing the creative genius.
And for the record, Twilight is the best love story put on film (and in print). She needs to hop on that wagon.
Dad,
Thanks for the movie tip. Perhaps, Ms. Roberts should also re-focus her career to more Ocean's movies. This just further proves my point that as long as George is involved in a project, it will be a success.
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